Ho-Hum

“OMG!” Tracey declared as Miss17 walked into the kitchen. “Your makeup is awesome!”

I looked up from my screen.

Miss17 stood beaming at her Mum with a face full of darker lips and colour.

I love it when my kids play around with this sort of thing, whether they’re starting out using lippy to ruddy up their cheeks or developing a flare for blending.

Makeup, hair, clothes. If a kid is experimenting they’re the areas I prefer they concentrate their attention because there’s no permanent damage beyond embarrassment when I bring out the photos at future family functions like their weddings.

“Very beautiful,” I said dutifully.

And as you can see from the photo she is something of a stunner.

“You look like a geisha,” Tracey continued to gush.

My head jolted a bit as my eyes shot over to stare disbelievingly at my wife. I could tell she had no idea what I knew was coming.

Sure enough.

“What’s a geisha?” asked our daughter.

I do so love a good train wreck, which is why I wanted to watch Tracey’s face when it hit.

“Ummm….,” she said, eyes suddenly wide with uh-oh.

She shot a glance at me for help which I was only too happy to chip in.

“A geisha,” I said, “is a Japanese prostitute.” And just to be sure, “Sort of a high-class hooker.”

“Oh,” said Miss17, imitating a Wimbledon crowd for a few seconds with eyes bouncing from me to her mother and back before we all burst into laugher.

Which, of course, drew children from about the house to find out what they’d missed which was so hilarious.

“What’s gone on?” Master15 wanted to know.

“Nothing,” said Miss17, grinning “I was just showing off my new makeup.”

“Oh,” said Master15, checking out her face as she brushed past him to return to her room. “You look really nice.”

He’s never been shy about handing out the praise to members of the house when they put some effort in to their appearance. I swear when he was about five he’d make some of Tracey’s friends blush.

“Really?” Miss17 asked over her shoulder. “Thanks. Mum just told me I look like a ho.”